Content warnings for this episode include: Emotional Manipulation, God Cannibalism, Metaphors about eyes and fingers
Cosmic Politics
The Council of Heavens meeting chamber; a vault of cold cosmic metal with an open door and chairs arranged at an ornate meeting table.
Nikignik and Xyzikxyz take their seats at the table.
Nikignik
Are we the first ones here?
Xyzikxyz
Well, nearly. Others will arrive any moment though.
Nikignik
It has been a long time since I sat in this chamber. I once dreamed of it.
Xyzikxyz
I imagine it comes with some… memories.
Nikignik
Of course.
Xyzikxyz
It would be best not to dwell on that today. Today is a very big day. A victory. And everyone, myself included, is extremely glad to have you here…
Olbsalolb and Ephelzeph draw near.
Olbsalolb
…in this preposterous arrangement. I don’t know how he expects me to accelerate the process; molecules don’t just decide to organize themselves. Now if I had even a substrate of organic compounds to work with we might be in business.
Ephelzeph
You forget that heat, cold, pressure, molecule, are the tools of my craft too. But when your work is done, we have another kind of rock to add to the thousands we have already, and when my work is done a living, breathing atmosphere is set in motion. If you had to deal with the kind of complexities weather phenomena require I think you might burst.
Olbsalolb
Oh, so easy, is it? I have seen that little stunt you played with the diamond rain and I find it ridiculous. And I play my part in your atmospheres as well. Keep running your tongue and I will face you with a hydrogen shortage. Lower the condensation point of water. See what rainstorms you can conjure then.
Ephelzeph and Olbsalolb take their seats.
Olbsalolb
But look, the scientist has beaten us to the table.
Xyzikxyz
Olbsalolb, Ephelzeph. A pleasure to see you again as always.
Ephelzeph
I assume the thing with all the eyes is our new arrival and not one of your experiments?
Nikignik
Ah, yes. Nikignik, One Hundred Eyes in the Dark. I have been asked to join today’s council meeting by…
Ephelzeph
We know. Believe me, we know.
Olbsalolb
Last-minute changes... I would have preferred notification well in advance. He practically adds another god to the council on our way in the door.
Ephelzeph
You must learn to adapt, gas-meister. I am happy to see you at the table, Nikignik, One Hundred Eyes in the Dark. I think I remember you from the gates, once.
Olbsalolb
No, that was a beast of some kind.
Nikignik
That was I. Much time has passed, since then.
Olbsalolb
Has it? I hadn’t noticed. When was our last meeting?
Ephelzeph
We have met every million years for the last ten billion. It has not changed. How do you forget?
Xyzikxyz
Which I find to be a rather demanding pace. I have experiments to manage. It’s difficult when I have to put everything down and make for the council chamber so often.
Olbsalolb
Oh yes. I have test molecules dissolving, as we speak.
Ephelzeph
All my storms dwindle every time. I have to start from scratch.
Nikignik
I suppose a million years has come to feel like a long time to me.
Olbsalolb
Well, at your age I’m sure it felt like a long time to me as well.
Skryekeskrye creeps up on the table.
Skryekeskrye
Seven threads have long been winding
Through these halls and stars and doors
We cannot see the noose yet, binding
The eighth one twists us even more!
Olbsalolb
Must you always enter without announcing yourself, you old spinster?
Ephelzeph
Another prophecy, fate-spinner? I don’t suppose you know what this one is about?
Xyzikxyz
I find it one of her more pedestrian ditties. And frankly rather rude.
Nikignik
I take no insult, even if it was intended. Skryekeskrye, Spinner of Fates, we have not met but I have been informed as to the nature of your work. Although I must admit I am unclear on the function of your domain exactly. The future remains a nearly impenetrable field of view, after all.
Xyzikxyz
Unless you have blood cards.
Nikignik
Unless you have blood cards.
Skryekeskrye
Is it so strange to you, One Hundred Eyes? We deal in story the way that the Master of Matters and the Endless Storm trade in states of matter. You are the present, and you hold each thread of story, shift between them, watch as they slip through your hands. I look further up the thread.
Nikignik
Prediction, then. Observing the present and making calculated guesses about where it shall lead. If that is the case then we really do deal in much the same fare.
Xyzikxyz
Nikignik.
Nikignik
Forgive me, fate-spinner. I do not mean to offend with my curiosity.
Skryekeskrye
It is not the same. You feel the darkness, shaking the strings, but for all your eyes you are blind to it, the one place you can never look. I see it. I see it.
Olbsalolb
I don’t suppose you could take a peek into the future and see how long it will take our host to arrive.
Another presence enters the chamber.
Ephelzeph
Who-Guards-a-Thousand-Suns. You grace us again with your light.
Tolshotol
Despite your best efforts, cloud-maker.
Xyzikxyz
You seem distressed, Tolshotol. What’s wrong? Running low on wolves?
Tolshotol
If it were a different day, voidwing, I might take offense. But our petty games on mortal planes have no bearing on the subject of today’s council meeting. I suggest we focus on our purpose before the arrival of our heavenly host.
Tolshotol takes her seat near the head of the table.
Nikignik (Whispering)
Should I introduce myself? I am not sure she noticed me.
Xyzikxyz (Whispering back)
I’m sure she did, she just doesn’t care.
Nikignik (Whispering)
Ah.
Syrensyr takes his seat at the head of the table.
Syrensyr
Well? No need to all look so glum. It is a serious business for which I have summoned you here, yes, but a great day for the Council’s future as well. Now that we are all here, let us begin.
Nikignik (Whispering)
I thought there were eight.
Xyzikxyz (Whispering back)
There are.
Nikignik (Whispering)
We are seven only. Is Noptilnopt not joining us?
Syrensyr
The first order of business, I acknowledge that the addition of Nikignik, One Hundred Eyes in the Dark, to the Council of Heavens was sudden. Unprecedented, even. But I think Nikignik’s heroic actions, preventing the criminal Marolmar from his resurrection, have earned him a seat at the table.
Nikignik
I… thank you, Reclaimer of Fire. It is a great honor to be seated here. To have a voice at your table.
Syrensyr
Yes, yes.
Nikignik
If I may ask, and forgive my curious nature. You referred to Marolmar as a criminal. Of what crime was he accused?
Olbsalolb, Xyzikxyz, Ephelzeph
*a tense inhale*
Syrensyr
Crime?
chuckles
Crime against order. Of course.
Nikignik
I beg your forgiveness, burning-forge, but what is a crime against order?
Xyzikxyz
Forgive him, soul-forger, he is new and does not understand…
Syrensyr
No, I can tell he does not understand... I can tell you do not understand, Nikignik. Do you have the faintest idea of what we do here?
Nikignik
Of course. You meet and… discuss. The universe.
Syrensyr
Oh dear.
Olbsalolb
Outrageous.
Nikignik
I am not seeking to offend anyone…
Syrensyr
No, no, there is no harm in asking questions, Nikignik. You are in no danger here. Not in this room. Never in this room. We were all young like you, at some point. For me, a very long time ago. Let us start here. What is my domain?
Nikignik
You are responsible for souls. Their seeding, growth, harvesting, recycling.
Syrensyr
Wrong. Desperately wrong.
Yes, I have power over souls, but my domain… is this table.
Nikignik
The table.
Syrensyr
Yes. Before this universe existed, there were gods, fighting. Tumbling miasmic in the void. Eating each other. But I knew that this could not sustain itself forever; we would tear everything apart. So I chose you, did I not, Tolshotol, to preserve the stars, that domain which you were so gifted in keeping?
Tolshotol
You did. And ever since, I have fiercely guarded them. They are mine.
Syrensyr
Yours alone. And then there was light. And I chose you, Olbsalolb, to give matter its shape and form. Liquid, gas, solid.
Olbsalolb
And plasma, of course.
Syrensyr
We shall talk later about plasma. Elements of the universe took form and shape. Gave birth to planets. Chemical conglomerations amassing in the light of the first suns. And then I chose Ephelzeph to separate the land from the water, and give worlds the ideal conditions to create life.
Ephelzeph
Some better-suited than others. I do enjoy painting in frost.
Syrensyr
You each have your place on the Council. You each uphold a pillar of this universe. And I am the one who gathered you here. To prevent all-out war between us from ever tearing this universe apart again. And despite our tussles by proxy on this little world or that, the power wielded by each member of this council remains aligned. My domain is this table, and everyone who sits at it. My domain is a universe that is ordered so that life can prevail. That is the purpose of this Council, Nikignik. That is the responsibility you have taken on in taking this seat. Protecting life itself. What your… friend, Marolmar, would have brought was chaos. Destruction. Undoing our work, setting us back into an age of war. Ultimately, destroying all life.
Nikignik
I believe I understand. Thank you for your explanation to one new to this heavenly sphere.
Syrensyr
You will learn in time. You will learn very quickly, I think. I would like you to shadow me in the millennia to come. Will you accept?
Nikignik
I… well, I have certain projects as well…
Xyzikxyz (whispering)
Say yes. And thank you.
Nikignik
Yes. I would be greatly honored to attend your affairs.
Syrensyr
Wonderful. And your own gifts will serve the council well. I don’t know how we ever overlooked you. Now that we have embarked on a little history lesson, Tolshotol, would you elucidate our guests as to the primary focus of this meeting?
Tolshotol
Certainly.
We have spoken of Urnundurn, the Black Eternity, before. It is an Indescribable like us, but it has never exchanged words with any of our diplomats. All that it touches, it swallows. It lingers, just outside the expanding border of the universe. Ever pushed back by the edge of creation. My new stars are lit as vigils against it, to mark the territory of the Council of Heavens. But now…
Skryekeskrye
It has sent us dark gifts. Comets from beyond space. Eyes and fingers peeled from its body. It watches ever inwards, surrounding us. And now it hungers.
Olbsalolb
Urnundurn is an empty bag. What power can ‘nothing’ have? It has never troubled us before.
Syrensyr
Urnundurn’s offenses, beyond sending substances into our universe that are harmful to indescribable life, have been few. Until now.
Tolshotol
There are no more stars.
Xyzikxyz
Would you care to elaborate on that?
Tolshotol
The expansion has stopped. The stars I am attempting to light are being consumed. Urnundurn has brought the border of the visible universe to a standstill. And now the border is beginning to recede.
Skryekeskrye
A rope I was, a rope were you
Squeezing tight into the flesh until
All breath was turned to crimson dew
Ephelzeph
I do not understand. Are we under attack? Must we kill another of our kind so soon?
Syrensyr
That is what our council is called to determine. Now, I know the fickle fellow fears the fire of souls. It will not dare to press us too much while I still remain in this universe. But its interference in our expansion is concerning.
Skryekeskrye
A bad omen. A bad string.
Olbsalolb
What other kind of omen do you ever deal in?
Syrensyr
This is the problem at hand. We will take a brief intermission—say, a hundred years?—and reconvene to discuss our resolution. The Council is adjourned.
The Council rises and begins to go their separate ways.
Nikignik (mutters)
A hundred years.
Olbsalolb
Barely enough time to stretch.
Xyzikxyz
Well, this is not what I expected to spend today discussing.
Nikignik
I know Urnundurn. His hand is on Earth. Knives made from his meteors kill our kind. There are those that worship him.
Xyzikxyz
I’m sure a time will come in the rest of the meeting for you to talk about earth things. Just. Wait for the appropriate moment.
Nikignik
Yes. The appropriate moment.
—
Outside the meeting hall, during their intermission. Nikignik runs into someone he cannot see.
Nikignik
Ah! Pardon me.
Noptilnopt
Oh it’s quite alright. It happens all the time.
Nikignik
You are Noptilnopt.
Noptilnopt
Who walks unseen, yes. And who others walk into.
Nikignik
I… am not used to not seeing someone. Sight is my domain.
Noptilnopt
I know. I used to wander the grounds, and see you at the gate. Watching. Dreaming.
Nikignik
Really? You never spoke to me. Truth be told I was not entirely sure you existed.
Noptilnopt
I don’t speak often, frankly.
Nikignik
Were you in attendance just now? If you were, you did not speak then either.
Noptilnopt
I suppose we are similar in our watching. From the outside. They know that I am here, but I rarely see fit to interrupt my solitude. To break the barrier between us. Remind them that I am watching, and listening.
Nikignik
You are more than welcome to speak to me, should you feel moved to. I remember all too well being overlooked.
Noptilnopt
Perhaps I shall.
Nikignik
What do you make of this Urnundurn business? I suppose nothingness is no stranger to you.
Noptilnopt
I assure you, I am not nothing, even if I cannot be seen. My history is invisible, but still exists.
Nikignik
I did not mean to imply that it did not.
Noptilnopt
One suggestion? Be careful. Syrensyr is evaluating you. Some of the others are more jealous than they let on. Even though we are all friends at the table, they will play games if they think no one is watching.
Nikignik
Luckily for me, I am always watching.
Noptilnopt
Some things might even evade you. As much as I believe in the extent of your sight. But your domain is dream, too, is it not?
Nikignik
I do not think dream has much value here. The Council of Heavens never sleep.
Noptilnopt
I sleep. Sometimes even dream. I think it is a lovely art form. If you do not mind my saying so.
Nikignik
Not at all. I concur. Someday they will regard Zazzlezazz not as a derelict inconvenience but as a pioneer of his craft.
Noptilnopt
If Urnundurn continues unchecked, dream might be all we have left.
Nikignik
In some ways I think it is all we ever had.
Noptilnopt
Perhaps.
Nikignik
I will see you around, I suppose. Or… I am sorry. I suppose I will not. But I hope you will be there anyways.
Noptilnopt
See you around, Nikignik.
Noptilnopt departs.
Nikignik
Oh dreamers… this is going to be a lot of work.
The bonus story that goes with this episode is called 'One More Thread' and is available on the Hello From The Hallowoods Patreon. Consider joining for access to all the show's bonus stories, behind-the-scenes and more! Until next time, dreamers, it’s best not to get into politics at the dinner table. There are so rarely politicians there. Get into politics in the arena of your local government instead. As a sport where two enter the ring and only one walk out, politics may seem barbaric at first, however it has the potential to entertain the crowd and give you a lasting reputation as the greatest warrior in the arena. Be prepared to spill much blood upon the sand.
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